Five British TV shows that are basically a degree in this country
Hot take: you cannot understand a country’s culture without watching its television. You can go to museums, pubs, read newspapers, talk to locals — but until you turn on national TV at prime time, you’re a tourist. British television is my anthropological empire. This is where you learn what the country thinks about itself, about others, about sex, about class.
Here’s some gold that isn’t The Traitors or Great British Bake Off (both deeply loved, and the latter just launched a new celebrity season):
Naked Attraction The format is simple: one person chooses a partner from six candidates standing behind glass panels, completely naked. The panels rise from the bottom up — first you see only legs and genitals, then the torso, then the face. The host comments on the proceedings with the energy of someone discussing the weather. “Hmm, interesting choice. What do you think about the size of his penis?” Then a happy couple heads off on a date. Airs on Channel 4 in prime time since 2016.
Googlebox A show in which ordinary British families watch television. That is it. Meaning you watch television in which people watch television and react to it. This sounds like conceptual art but it’s just Friday night on Channel 4. And it’s one of the warmest and most honest portraits of this country I’ve ever seen. There are elderly gay men from Brighton, a large Liverpool family, a group of friends from Leeds. Half of what they say is incomprehensible due to regional accents, but good for learning English British.
Benidorm A sitcom about British tourists at a Spanish resort. They drink from the morning, burn in the sun, eat a full English breakfast in forty-degree heat and reproduce every single stereotype about themselves. Teenage pregnancy, rooms without air conditioning, karaoke at Bar Neptune, affairs with the Spanish barman, all inclusive, literally. This is either the highest level of self-awareness or the complete absence of it — three years in Britain and I still haven’t decided.
Big Brother The classic. The godfather of the whole genre. Cameras everywhere, no way out, tasks are absurd, people gradually start to hate each other, the nation votes on who to evict. Launched in 2000, cancelled in 2018, relaunched in 2023. Used to air 24/7.
Virgin Island Young people who have never been in intimate relationships — for various reasons, from social anxiety to it simply never happening — go to an island and discover their sexuality. Sounds wholesome but in practice, it’s cringe. There are no cynical participants who came for the followers. They attend strange classes with fairly eccentric teachers and the whole thing is deeply uncomfortable to watch. Next to Naked Attraction, where everything starts with anatomy, Virgin Island looks almost like Jane Austen. Well, almost.
BONUS: Last One Laughing Season 2 is actully good!
